Girlfriends Guide to Sexual Health (And What Really Matters)

  • Written By:Robin Levine Shobin
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Creating sexual health involves having your body, physically and mentally, operating at its optimum hormone health and libido levels.

Sex health. It’s a thing. And as I get older and wiser, I would now argue it’s one of the most important parts of your health. If not, the most important. The term “sexual health” almost seems dated – like the “sex ed” classes you would take in school. But what sexual health should mean to women is balanced hormones, healthy vaginas, and rock solid libidos (yes – libido is a women’s thing too!).

Sex drives suffer for men and women as they get older. So many of my friends speak about their lack of sex drive after having kids—and they often chalk this up to just simply getting older. Then throw in the exhaustion of childcare, endless work from home zoom meetings, spending a lot of time with your partner (or spending a lot of time alone). If your sexual health was struggling before COVID. COVID definitely didn’t make it better. Never mind the anxiety and stress of the current world we live in.

According to the CDC, sexual health is defined as “a state of physical, emotional, mental, and social well-being in relation to sexuality.” Health expert Samantha Blakeney explains, “it is often assumed to be the lack of disease and dysfunction, but it’s so much more than that. It’s actually positive and attentive approach to your sexuality and the sexual relationship(s) in your life.”

When I talk about “sexual health,” I am not talking purely about your sex life. I am talking about your actual feminine wellbeing. Enter the company, Sex and Good, where we want you to actually harness your badass female self and make sure you are operating at peak performance.

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Women’s health advocate and media personality Carole Radziwill believes that sexual wellness should be a woman's top priority. "It impacts everything in her life—from sexual vitality to mood to aging. Healthy libidos and sex hormones play an important role in maintaining not only sexual health, it also impacts skin aging, as well as brain and bone health,” she says. (In full disclosure, Carole is a Sex and Good brand partner and avid consumer of our Sex and Good Oh Mega Yummy Gummy.)

And other than ‘happy hormones’ and ‘healthy vaginas,’ sex (whether it is with a partner or alone) is legitimately good for our health. It lowers stress, it boosts immunity, and it makes us happy. So, why aren’t we prioritizing that? Other than the acts of sex itself (which Blakeney explains can be so powerful that studies say it can even treat migraines!), creating sexual health involves having your body, physically and mentally, operating at its optimum hormone health and libido levels.

My beauty and wellness routine includes a whole slew of beauty products from serums to eye creams. My supplements include zinc, vitamin C and magnesium…to name a few. But what’s in your sexual health routine? Is it meditating, is it masturbating, is it supplementing?

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Who doesn’t want to feel happier, have a better sex life, sleep better, and be less stressed? But we often ignore this basic part of our wellness routines because our own sexual wellbeing is not viewed as a priority. You would never miss putting on your eye cream at night, right? But if your hormones were balanced, would you also be sleeping better? Would you feel less fatigued?

Sexual wellness is perceived as either taboo (we don’t want to talk about it), a luxury given only to the young and single, or it’s just assumed that as we get older, this is less and less a part of our lives. When in fact, this is when we should be prioritizing it even more.

Corina Crysler, expert formulator and sexuality coach (my friend and Charlotte’s Book contributor), who has seen her practice sky rocket during COVID believes that women’s needs in sexuality are too often overlooked. “And women are so used to spending their time being the caregiver, rather than thinking about her own needs. When in fact, the women’s needs for sexuality are equally if not more important,” she says. “Libido is often seen as a man’s issue, but it’s a paramount issue for women too. Sexual wellness is critical for our life-force energy, or what I refer to as our sexual energy.  To access or activate your sexual energy, it requires the coherence of the spirit, mind and body. Our spirituality and sexuality are not separate. They can create the foundation of your well-being, our awareness, and your overall vitality.”

So how do you start to take control of your sexual wellness? That guide comes in my next installment of Girlfriend’s Guide. But in the meantime, check out www.sexandgood.com.

Want more? Read my Girlfriend's Guide To Ulthera, or my Girlfriend's Guide to Low-Sugar Cocktails.

Robin Levine is the founder of Charlotte’s Book.

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